


Slice of Life

by Barb Cummings (Rahirah)



Series: The Barbverse [63]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Domestic, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-21
Updated: 2009-11-21
Packaged: 2017-10-03 12:07:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rahirah/pseuds/Barb%20Cummings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"So really? My track record of not falling for evil guys is fantastic."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Slice of Life

**Author's Note:**

> This story is set in the same universe as _A Raising in the Sun_, _Necessary Evils_, et. al. (See the [Barbverse Timeline](http://sleepingjaguars.com/buffy/viewpage.php?page=timeline) for specifics.) It contains spoilers for previous works in the series.

"... and then she started lecturing me about my bad boy fetish," Buffy said, leaning back in the alarmingly spindle-legged chair and running a protective hand over the swell of her stomach. "And how Mom was the same way about Dad, and how in ten years I was going to regret it just like Mom did and end up a divorced mother of two - "

Dawn snickered and sipped her latte. The brightly striped café awning overhead fluttered in the evening breeze, and the chatter of diners at the other tables provided a spritely background to the tale of Slayerly woe. "Boy, Aunt Darlene has you pegged. And if you and Spike keep going at it like this, you'll be the divorced mother of six."

Buffy scowled and chucked a packet of Sweet N' Low across the table at her sister. "My brain stopped functioning at the concept of Dad as bad boy, fetishy or otherwise." She sighed. "Well, she had to find out about the vampire thing some time, I guess. I just hope she doesn't go all weird about Billy visiting." Her lower lip plumped in a pout. "Why doesn't anyone ever lecture Spike about his good girl fetish? He totally fell for me because I can kick his ass."

"Probably because Spike would ignore them," Dawn said cheerily, squeezing a lavish dollop of ketchup onto her fries. "Or rip their eyelids off, if he was in a good mood. You, on the other hand, just stand there looking satisfyingly meek and guilty."

"I don't even see it," Buffy grumbled, with a covetous look at the fries. "The bad boy thing. I mean, sure, Spike's evil, in a non-practicing way. But it's not like that's the reason I fell for him. And Riley? Dudley Do-Right levels of non-evil."

Dawn rolled her eyes at Buffy's already-decimated plate and pushed the basket to the center of the table. "What about Angel?"

Her sister dove in with gusto. "Only fifty percent evil." Buffy waved an explanatory fry. "Plus Owen, Scott, and those two guys back at Hemery, all one-hundred-percent guaranteed evil-free. So really? My track record of not falling for evil guys is fantastic."

"Just lucky you made an exception, am I?"

Spike jogged up, breathing hard after a stirring game of 'running from shadow to shadow without burning to death.' Billy, astride his father's shoulders, dug his heels in, tugged enthusiastically at Spike's hair and demanded, "Let's go round again, Daddy! Giddyap horsie!"

"Not a chance," Spike swung his protesting son down to earth and collapsed into the chair next to Buffy's. "You've knackered me. Forces of evil will just have to prevail tonight. 'lo, Bit." He nodded to Dawn, stole a fry and raised an eyebrow. "How'd it go?"

Buffy grimaced and ruffled Billy's curls. "Not great. She's nailing strings of garlic to her front door. I told her all it would do was make you sniffle, but... hey, big guy. Come to say hello to your sister?" Billy nodded solemnly and pressed his ear to her belly.

"Ah, well, bugger Aunt Darlene. Never liked the old cow anyway." At Buffy's forlorn look, Spike added hastily, "But she's growing on me by the minute. Don't fret, love, I'll bring her round. Not a woman alive can resist me long. Well, a few. Lots, actually, but five quid says she's not one of them. You didn't get too much sun, did you? Enough to eat? You're looking peaked. Oi, you! Over here and take the lady's order!"

"So Spike," Dawn asked as the waiter scurried over, "did you fall for Buffy because she can kick your ass?"

"Bloody right." Spike hoisted Billy onto his lap. "Keep that in mind for the future, my little man. Any bloke who can't handle a woman kicking his arse is a big pussy."

"A big pussy," Billy repeated with gleeful obedience.

Buffy thwacked Spike's shoulder. Spike smirked. Dawn gave Aunt Darlene a week. Tops.

 

**END**


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